my ever dearest only niece whispered in my ears ytd, "i wish i have a fairy godmother!"
i wish my kid in the future will be like her.
was looking around at my relatives and cousins at my cousin's wedding dinner, the effect of having so many male, older cousins suddenly struck me with a peculiar feeling. their presence had never been so real to me before. sounds strange but true. perhaps if u were in my position u will understand why. suddenly everyone's grown up. i see them lighting their ciggs in one corner, puffing away. with a slight blush from drinking. they in their early twenties. all except one are already working. all will mean something once you know how many male cousins i have.
the 4th and 5th uncles' sons are still in primary schools so they're not counted. it feels like seeing a bunch of familiar faces changing and growing up everytime u see them. from having dorky hairstyles, being scrawny or plump, to grown ups with girlfriends and ready to marry at early 20s. that's abt it. i don't remember ever having conversations with them. young time maybe. but i've never viewed them as people close to me. i guess this is the problem with having relatives being raised differently from you. me with a singaporean unapproachable attitude, and them not knowing how and what to talk to me. gosh, im so alienated from my cousins. if only i were ever close to my cousins. imagine how pampered i'll feel with so many older guys around me. hahh. coolness. oh. my 'closest' male cousin opened a pub in clark quay called 'waiting place'. interesting eh. feel like chilling out in the nights, haven done that for a long time.
reminder to myself: continue to work hard. play hard.